My client ended our session with this question last week. I gave them an answer but now that I’ve had more time to think I would add some things. My initial response was that I am not happy all the time. I think times when you feel down can and should be honored. Sadness, anger, irritability have their place and time in life and can be good teachers. The rest of my three-fold answer went something like this:
I practice what I preach, for the most part. When I make suggestions to clients to try certain things to make life more enjoyable it is because I have tried them or do them on a regular basis myself. I am happy because grouchy therapists, although they exist, are not very desirable. When I am working it is part of my job to be encouraging and I gladly take on that role. And, I have a lot to be thankful for in life and focusing on that is an instant mood lifter.
The part I didn’t get to mention, mostly because I was caught off guard, is that when I am working with clients I am doing what I love! Encouraging people to make positive changes in their life and actually seeing the changes happen is an amazing process that I am blessed to be a part of. This was my last client of a long day but I was still feeling great because doing this work makes me happy! While I think happiness can exist wherever you choose it in your life, it sure helps when you are doing something that brings you joy.
I fully believe that happiness is a choice that most of us can make on a regular basis if we learn to get in that habit. We can easily lose sight of happy though and move into angry, bitter, resentful, negative, sad, etc. We start to think that is our new normal and that’s where things can get tricky. The further away we get from happy the harder it can be to find our way back. I think our true nature is happy and that it is available to us all. Even those suffering from very real clinical depression can make choices that will support a better mood. I’m not saying it is easy but it is possible. Start today by infusing your day with things that you know bring you joy. Make time for those things more and more and watch your mood increase. If you don’t know what brings you joy start my trying different things. Read a good book, dance in your living room, spend time outside, play with kids or animals (notice how happy they always are!), try a new hobby, laugh for no reason, create something. The sky is the limit but remember your power and that you have control of your life!