Sound Healing for Peace

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Lately things in the world and in my own life have felt heavy. As much as I love NPR, I just couldn’t listen to one more story in my car about the state of things. So, one day I put on my favorite kirtan singer Devadas and just belted out the divine names along with him. Immediately tears streamed down my face and I remembered what it is to be connected.

I have had some profound sound healing experiences. My first kirtan with Devadas is one of those pivotal moments. He introduced me to the world of kirtan and I made it a point to see many other artists after learning about this type of music. Three years later when I saw Devadas again I was moved beyond words. I literally couldn’t stop the flood of tears that rushed out upon hearing his first bhajan.

Music has always moved me. My dad sang and played the guitar with me when I was little,  I’ve had a rich appreciation for musicals since I was young, and concerts were a way that my single mom and I got to connect and spend time together. I come from a family of singers and we can often be found enjoying an evening of karaoke.

All of the women’s circles I lead include a closing song and sometimes one at the beginning and middle also. Newcomers are sometimes taken aback when I introduce group singing but more often than not it becomes their favorite part of our gathering.

Sound moves and heals. Not just through music and song either. While living in San Jose I got to experience the crystal singing bowls. My first sound bath was pretty magical and I love seeing group sound healings become popular in the community.

Sound alone can be so healing but I think we also need community to be part of this equation. I can sing and cry in my car but the moments that I have felt such deep reverence for life and source were the moments I was experiencing sound with others. That concert when everyone is singing along, the call and response chanting, the sing alongs with dad and his guitar, they are all moments of being seen.

And when I listen to Devadas or Suzanne Sterling (another favorite is her album of ritual chants) in my car, it’s because I have had an in person experience that moved me. It’s that moment of feeling seen and being connected to something bigger than myself that I call on.

I can’t wait to be part of the Singing Sirens Women’s Retreat where the whole weekend will be focused on curating moments of connection to self and the power of sound. Join us at Terra Madra in Escondido June 14-16. Check out more details including various ticketing options HERE. I’ll be teaching on Sunday morning using asana, breath, mantra and mudra.

And next time you just can’t listen to another news story, turn on your favorite song and sing along as loud as you can. Get back to me on how you feel afterwards.

photo by Darci Fontenot

photo by Darci Fontenot

Healthy Weeknight Favorite

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We eat Mexican inspired food usually once a week in our house. Both my husband and I were born and raised in San Diego and Mexican cuisine is very well loved. As much as we dig the local taco shop food, we try to eat as healthy as we can. Cooking at home is one way we can make sure we approve of all the ingredients in our meals. This recipe inspired by Angela Liddon’s “Oh She Glows Everyday” cookbook is making the rounds in our kitchen lately.

Mexican-Style Stuffed Sweet Potatoes

2 medium sweet potatoes
garlic
green onion
veggies of choice cut smaller than our normal taco night size (we used mushroom, red pepper, zucchini, cauliflower)
cumin, garlic powder, onion powder, lime, tapatio, s&p (or whatever seasoning you like)
black beans
Toppings: grated cheese, hot sauce or salsa of choice, cilantro, guacamole, pepitas, sour cream (I’m not a fan)

  1. Wash and lightly oil outside of sweet potatoes. Bake at 400 until soft (they take about 45min-1 hr in my toaster oven)
  2. Cook up veggies until soft. Add black beans at the end to warm.
  3. Cut sweet potatoes in 1/2, mash inside slightly and fill with veggie/black bean mixture
  4. Have fun with toppings.
  5. Eat and Enjoy

The leftover veggie mixture makes an excellent breakfast. Just add an egg (which makes a lot of things more magical in our house)

my husband chopped these – my veggies are never that uniform

choose your seasonings

once veggies are cooked, add black beans just until warm

Get topping wasted and enjoy. YUM!

Yoga for Trauma

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I am a therapist and a yoga teacher and it’s very interesting to watch my two worlds come together. We are discovering that it’s hard to talk about yoga without including some aspects of psychology and the mind. It’s also exceedingly difficult to heal trauma without involving the body.

Next month I will lead my second 6 week series on Yoga for Trauma Healing. The interest has been high and the course is sold out. I am in the process of finding out a way to offer this on a regular basis to meet the needs of the community and because I believe in this work. I am also exploring how to make this more accessible for all who are interested in doing this healing work.

You may be hearing a lot of talk about trauma both in the media and in the wellness community. It’s sort of a hot button topic right now and there are good reasons for this.

Researchers are gathering more and more information about how our brain and body remembers, stores and processes traumatic incidents. The saying “the issues are in our tissues” is a quick way to illustrate what we are finding; the body never forgets. So it makes sense that the body oriented interventions are being proven most effective at targeting trauma.

As far as I am concerned, no one who is having a human experience will ever escape trauma. The definition is far more broad than most of us think and this means that we all have some level of trauma that we can work to heal.

I am grateful I get to hold space for individuals working to heal trauma both in this group series and in the individual work that I do with people. But, this also means that I have to be aware of my own traumas.

When I say all humans have some level of trauma, this certainly applies to practitioners supporting people to heal trauma too. Some of us have even more work to do so that we can be grounded enough to show up for others.

Another piece of the trauma puzzle that cannot be ignored is that of race and other social justice issues. As a white woman I have work to do in not only acknowledging my own privilege but also in recognizing all the ways trauma can present itself due to inequalities in our society.

I’m thankful to see the amount of discussion that is being generated around trauma but this also means we have to meet it with just as much if not more discernment. Listen to your own intuition about exploring this with a practitioner. Trauma work is sensitive work and should be approached with the utmost care.

Dear Plant Babies

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I know I have been less than skilled in being a caretaker for you in the past. But, I am turning over a new leaf (get it?!) and claiming this the year of keeping things alive. 2018 brought me a move back to my beloved San Diego and the good fortune of becoming a homeowner. 2019 is allowing me the time and space to make my house a home including filling it with living, breathing plant life.

The story I have been telling myself about not being good at taking care of plants is just that, a story. But, my black thumb storyline is no longer working for me. Our words have power and my new story is that of a plant priestess who grows all things with ease.

There are so many stories we accept as truth simply because it’s easier, more familiar or we just don’t believe in our own magic.

So, little plant babies, I vow to do my very best. You will get names and kind words, reiki, water and sunshine. I might even sing to you. Because who wouldn’t thrive with all of that love. May I also remember to offer all of this to myself and the other human and animal folks around me.

Please don’t die!

Plantfully yours,

Jesalyn

Taking a Breiki

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My sisters were my first ever Reiki 1 class back in 2012. I have been teaching regularly since then and love sharing this healing modality. It gives me a lot of joy to play a small role in people embracing their inner healer. I also always learn from my students and feel a deep connection to myself and the energy each time I teach.

I’ve been resisting the call to take a break from teaching for some time. Why would spirit guide me to take a break from something I love? It’s easy to ask questions, but maybe we aren’t always meant to have answers. Trust is often all we have to go on when everything seems uncertain.

I believe intuition starts as a whisper and gets louder until you wake up to what’s being asked of you. So, I have finally decided to listen before the divine is forced to scream at me.

2019 is my year to scale back my classes entirely aside from the January Reiki master class I had agreed long ago to teach. It was lovely and bittersweet to have some wonderful souls share in my last class for awhile.

My break will include more weekends home to work on our house, the opportunity to learn other healing modalities (I am embarking on more yoga therapy this year), time for self-healing and self-reflection, and some things I probably couldn’t plan for even if I tried.

Reiki will still be a part of my life because it has been so intertwined these past years in everything that I do. I still offer individual sessions and incorporate it in many of my offerings. But the seat of the teacher is on the back burner for now. And I am at peace with it.

I don’t know what this year off will bring or what the plan for 2020 will be but if I had to guess I would say it will turn out perfectly and exactly according to plan.

Reiki master Jan 2019. Photo by Olivia Chapman Goss

Attunements (and funny faces) among the redwood trees. Photo by Olivia Chapman Goss

Transformation & Nourishment

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As 2018 comes to a close I end the year with some reflection. My 2 words for the year were Transformation & Nourishment. The words are chosen intuitively and then I wait to see how they unfold. They exist as the first intention I set before the new year and serve as the backdrop for life lessons and themes.

Transformation

The biggest thing that happened in this category is that my husband and I moved back to San Diego and some months later bought a house. We transformed the way our life looked entirely including a period of cocooning in which we lived with my dad and his wife. Big changes on this front were not without their challenges but we are super stoked to have landed in a beautiful home we hope to stay in for many years. It’s funny to me that even 9 months later sometimes I still get confused about whether I am in San Jose or San Diego. It took me awhile to get settled when we moved up there so I suspect the same amount of transition time is expected on our return. With the move many other things transformed including my offering of women’s circles to the community and my job. It felt really lovely to leave my Goddess Circles behind to the community at large. Everyone at the yoga studio in San Jose took turns leading each month for a true collective. It makes my heart so warm to know that I started something that can continue and thrive in my absence. I was not sure where I would land job wise but much to my surprise I have found a new area in which to work. I started working for Hospice which was absolutely last on my list in the past. A transformation of my career path as well as a complete change in my perception of what kind of social worker I want to be. My moving back to San Diego meant leaving a private practice job and clients that I loved but I continued work with some of them remotely and have also started a new practice locally (my website got a makeover too!). I was fortunate this year to practice in person not once but twice with my favorite yoga teacher Elena Brower. Her perspectives on life and practice are always transforming me. I also got to interview her on my podcast which I hope was illuminating for those who maybe had never heard of her. That interview transformed me into a giddy schoolgirl as I gushed about how much I love her 😉 Transformation does not always feel positive and on that note at least two souls who meant something to me made their transition onto the next phase. It was unexpected since they were both suicides but somehow it helps me to trust that their transformation had a purpose even if it’s one I might never know.  On a silly note, although meaningful to me, I dyed my hair for the first time in my life. I didn’t cover the grays which are ever prevalent but instead went for purple and turquoise and I loved it!

Nourishment 

Being home with family and close friends has provided the deepest nourishment by far this year. We have been there for birthdays, all the holidays and wonderful random gatherings. Family was the main reason we had always planned to return and it felt so good to be back with all the people we love the most. San Diego food was the thing we missed the second most and we had a good time revisiting all of our old favorites. I had a beautiful period of time when we arrived home where I didn’t have a job, slept in more than I ever have and had lunch with my work from home husband nearly every day. Upon going back to work I got serious about making my meditation a priority again and I have not missed a day since the summer. I’ve been working with a local acupuncturist and have provided much needed nourishment to my body. With his guidance, I kick started my health with a 21 day cleanse and have since balanced out some concerns in my system. This also included a gnarly but much needed detox from traditional antiperspirants (probably in the transformation category but ultimately much more nourishing for my system). While I was still in San Jose I lead a Restorative & Reiki workshop series that not only provided nourishment to me but also to those in attendance. I’m always comforted by teaching reiki classes and I got a chance to do that various times this year; one class planned itself which was a fun surprise. I may have left my Goddess Circle community in San Jose but I got to return to my original new moon circle ladies in San Diego and that was such a breath of fresh air. I was deeply nourished by taking a yoga therapy training, returning to Jazzercise and leading a 6 week series on yoga for trauma. I got to offer yoga and reiki to my dad while living with him and he actually accepted this time; a nourishing experience for us both I suspect. My most favorite nourishing activity this year just might have been reading the entire Harry Potter series. I had avoided it in the past due to fantasy not really being my favorite category but wow was I wrong. What a fun time I had getting through that adventure. I tend to read a lot of non fiction which is informative but not always nourishing. Diving into this great fiction story was a source of great comfort to me towards the end of this year.

As we usher in 2019 the two words that have emerged are Surrender and Heal. Here’s to endings and new beginnings.

Best nine on Instagram for @jesalyneatchel

Best nine on Instagram for @wildishwisewomen

End of Life Lessons

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I work in Hospice now. The subject of death, dying and grief is a new but regular experience for me. If you had told me 10 years ago, at the very beginning of my career, that I would be doing this work, I would not have believed you. It was last on my list, just under working with older adults with mental illness which ended up being my first job out of school.

It was too difficult, too sad, and how could I ever be able to sit with someone in the most difficult time and still be effective. It took 10 years, but my perspective shifted and so when the time came for me to get a new job in San Diego I applied for the Hospice position.

At four months into this new area of social work I can honestly say that I like it quite a bit. I love to be a student of new things and I am certainly learning a lot. But way more than the knowledge of what to expect in the last stage of life, I am moved by the people, the stories, the connection.

And really in the end, the people is why I became a social worker in the first place. We are all humans having different experiences in our time here on Earth and deep connection is what brings us together. I love that I get to be with people when things are hard. But interestingly, for some the end is not as difficult as you might think. Their last stage of the life journey is welcome and peaceful. I get a peek into that sacred part of people’s lives and just as watching life come into this world, watching one go is an honor.

What I am learning is not really any different than what I already know to be true. Life is what you make of it and even in the end things can be joyful, humorous, lighthearted and full of love. It’s not to say that there isn’t sadness, anger, grief and despair; that’s there too. But, just like life, death brings a mixed bag of emotions and experiences. It’s not just one thing but many and the sum of those parts make for a beautiful and for me spiritual experience.

I Found God On My Yoga Mat

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I didn’t grow up religious. The rare church service I attended was with family or friends and it always seemed strange to me. We talked very little of God in my house. I didn’t pray. I knew I believed in something but it was not a well developed idea.

I found yoga when I was 17. It challenged me and made me curious. What was going on in my body and in my energy system I wondered. Why do I feel such bliss at the end?

I found God on my yoga mat in a Seane Corn class maybe 8 years ago. She asked us to call in the God of our own unique understanding. That was a game changer for me. I cried big alligator tears. Tears of truth and of love. I get to decide who God is to me? God was on my mat in that moment, God was in me and all around me.

A few years after that I went to New Hampshire on a whim for a weekend of kirtan (something I knew very little about) That first night I was moved the way I had seen people moved to tears singing hymns in church. This was a completely new feeling for me but it felt right.

There was such freedom in exploring a definition of God that transcended what I had been told. God didn’t have to be relegated to church or Bible stories. The word God actually made me uncomfortable for many years. I cringed when people mentioned God, religion or prayer.

Now I regularly seek divinity in all things. God can be found in the crispness of the early morning air, a beautiful flower or hummingbird. in the sweet kisses my husband gives me or in the sun setting over the ocean. And most especially on my mat when it’s just my practice, my body and the God of my choosing.

Off the Mat into the World training where I got to tell Seane (middle) that she brought God into my yoga.

For The FUN Of It!

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When was the last time you did something just for fun? No agenda, not checking something off your to-do list or any ulterior motive. Fun just for the fun of it.

I don’t do this nearly enough and I am guessing it’s true for you too. Kids and animals are great at reminding us of the importance of play! But even when we take cues from them, adult responsibilities are always looming. It’s easy to get caught up in things we have to do or things we should do, but what if we made play a priority?

Psychologists have started studying the impact of adult play in the last few years and it’s no surprise they are finding it is hugely beneficial. But, it’s something you have to make time for just like you carve out time to exercise or meditate or have a night out with your friends.

I have been feeling bogged down by a lot of things lately and the heaviness shows up in my body. So I’ve decided to make a commitment to doing things for fun each day next month. I am painfully aware of the lack of music in my life and want that, along with dancing to be a large part of my fun. I am open to other explorations of play and have enlisted my husband’s help; he happens to be a very playful person.

I’m not disillusioned about the fact that playing each day won’t solve all of my (and the world’s) problems. But, if it lifts just a bit of the weight that I have been feeling, a weight that leaves me feeling quite restless by the end of the day…I’ll take it!

Who wants to join me? And what will be your first playful action?

photo by Darci Fontenot

Meditation Exaltation

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It was almost three years ago that I took my first yoga teacher intensive with Elena Brower. I learned so much in those three days and yet she said the one thing she wanted us to leave with was the importance of a daily meditation practice. I knew meditation was important and I had dabbled in it but I never fully committed. I don’t know about you but I often have to hear things multiple times in multiple ways before they stick. And so I left that training with my intention set…I would become a daily meditator. And I did! I sat each day for 365 days straight. It was perhaps the most accomplished I had ever felt about anything. I also felt great.

But as life would have it, I did not continue long term with such vigor. I never fully gave up but I had moments where my practice waxed and waned. I had a time where I was more focused on asana and that was a nice change. They are both important and I struggled to balance my time between the two. Also, dedication and consistency do not come naturally to me and so I really have to make an effort. Maybe that is true for everyone but the story I sometimes tell myself is that other people commit and achieve things easier than I do.

My recent dip in dedicated came when we moved back to San Diego. For whatever glorious reason (sheer exhaustion I think) I was sleeping in a lot more than I ever have before. And so my practice suffered. If I don’t sit the moment I wake, before I start other things, it just won’t happen. I felt bad about it (because I packed my meditation cushion and everything!) but I let my body get the rest it needed.

Recently I started a new job and I knew it would be an adjustment. Funny to think when I had all the time in the world I was sleeping in. But now that I am getting up earlier I am making time to sit. It’s so worth it! But I have to choose it each day. I can’t hit snooze or do other things. It helps that right now we are living in one room and my cushion is literally right off my bed. So I roll out of bed, sit down, set my timer and just be.

If you are thinking that you can’t meditate or don’t have the time I challenge you to acknowledge that it doesn’t come easy for any of us and that’s why we practice. Also, we make time for what’s important.

But this is about me and my journey, not yours. Although if you needed that extra loving push to get started or keep going…here it is! I am here to say that meditation has changed my life and I’m grateful for all the times and ways it has enhanced my practice, shown me life lessons and impacted the way I show up in the world. It sounds somewhat silly to say it has made me a better person but it’s the truth. Just sit friends. You won’t regret it. And make sure to forgive yourself and keep going when your practice lags.

It should be noted that there are times when a seated meditation practice can bring up too much and is not recommended. In cases of trauma or extreme emotional distress meditation should either be avoided, approached with extreme caution or done with the support of a trauma informed therapist or meditation instructor. There is a great book on this topic that I just read called “Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness” by David Treleaven. It’s a great read.

photo by Darci Fontenot