Meditation Exaltation

Posted on August 30, 2018 by jesalynjae

It was almost three years ago that I took my first yoga teacher intensive with Elena Brower. I learned so much in those three days and yet she said the one thing she wanted us to leave with was the importance of a daily meditation practice. I knew meditation was important and I had dabbled in it but I never fully committed. I don’t know about you but I often have to hear things multiple times in multiple ways before they stick. And so I left that training with my intention set…I would become a daily meditator. And I did! I sat each day for 365 days straight. It was perhaps the most accomplished I had ever felt about anything. I also felt great.

But as life would have it, I did not continue long term with such vigor. I never fully gave up but I had moments where my practice waxed and waned. I had a time where I was more focused on asana and that was a nice change. They are both important and I struggled to balance my time between the two. Also, dedication and consistency do not come naturally to me and so I really have to make an effort. Maybe that is true for everyone but the story I sometimes tell myself is that other people commit and achieve things easier than I do.

My recent dip in dedicated came when we moved back to San Diego. For whatever glorious reason (sheer exhaustion I think) I was sleeping in a lot more than I ever have before. And so my practice suffered. If I don’t sit the moment I wake, before I start other things, it just won’t happen. I felt bad about it (because I packed my meditation cushion and everything!) but I let my body get the rest it needed.

Recently I started a new job and I knew it would be an adjustment. Funny to think when I had all the time in the world I was sleeping in. But now that I am getting up earlier I am making time to sit. It’s so worth it! But I have to choose it each day. I can’t hit snooze or do other things. It helps that right now we are living in one room and my cushion is literally right off my bed. So I roll out of bed, sit down, set my timer and just be.

If you are thinking that you can’t meditate or don’t have the time I challenge you to acknowledge that it doesn’t come easy for any of us and that’s why we practice. Also, we make time for what’s important.

But this is about me and my journey, not yours. Although if you needed that extra loving push to get started or keep going…here it is! I am here to say that meditation has changed my life and I’m grateful for all the times and ways it has enhanced my practice, shown me life lessons and impacted the way I show up in the world. It sounds somewhat silly to say it has made me a better person but it’s the truth. Just sit friends. You won’t regret it. And make sure to forgive yourself and keep going when your practice lags.

It should be noted that there are times when a seated meditation practice can bring up too much and is not recommended. In cases of trauma or extreme emotional distress meditation should either be avoided, approached with extreme caution or done with the support of a trauma informed therapist or meditation instructor. There is a great book on this topic that I just read called “Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness” by David Treleaven. It’s a great read.

photo by Darci Fontenot

Ecstatic Energy

Posted on June 27, 2017 by jesalynjae

I woke up on Easter in a F U N K. I was sad to be away from family, I was frustrated with other things going on in my life and I couldn’t handle the icky feeling I had in my body. So I gathered myself and decided to do something about it. I told my sleeping husband I was going to go to Ecstatic Dance in Palo Alto. I had been meaning to go for awhile and I was certain it would help. I had to take some sort of action because if left in this state I would inevitably lash out at someone, mostly likely my husband. He doesn’t deserve that and frankly I didn’t deserve to feel the way I did either. And I tell my clients all the time to do something to move the energy in their body when they are feeling stuck or yuck.

As soon as I started moving my body I could feel a shift. My movements matched the music…at first slow and rhythmic…transitioning to faster and more irregular. The beauty of this format is that moving your body is key but you can do it any way you want. Very few rules and absence of judgement creates a lot of freedom. My breath became more at ease, my mind slowly unraveled the worries that plagued me. I couldn’t quite shake the sadness though.

I took a break on the perimeter of the dance floor and started to tear up and then started to cry. Wet, hot tears rolled down my cheeks and caught the attention of a fellow dancer. I had seen this woman come in. She entered the dance floor with confidence and had a striking presence about her. She walked towards me, made eye contact with me and then came behind me. She wrapped her arms around me, one arm on my belly and the other hand on my heart. She nuzzled herself in close to me and took long, slow, deep breaths peppered with big sighs and hmmms.

My mind had a lot of things to say about this encounter “this is weird, right?” “I don’t even know this ladies name” “what will other people think?” “what the hell is happening?” “should I tell her to stop?”

But ultimately my body won out. My body is what got me there that day and my body is what needed this healing. I could feel the energetic shift as a weight dissipated from my heart. My tears slowed and my whole body softened. I knew when our time together was done and so I met her gaze and thanked her with my eyes.

I felt more whole than when I arrived but I also felt so exposed and raw. It was a vulnerable moment for me and I wasn’t sure if I would tell anyone about it. I found myself keeping track of this mysterious goddess healer as she moved across the dance floor. Should I go to her again and offer more thanks or at least introduce myself.

Ultimately I decided that I got exactly what I came for whether I knew it or not. I left before it ended and did not see her again. I actually haven’t been back since. I had a nice time and would certainly join another dance in the future but it just hasn’t happened. My openness to the experience is what stuck with me. Had I stayed home I would have been a jerk to my husband and felt awful all day. But I said yes to a shift, said yes to myself and in the end received even more than I bargained for. May we all say yes to moving stuck energy through movement, connection and kindness.

Dancing Blog Art

I Stayed Too Long

Posted on May 23, 2017 by jesalynjae

Know that what we do in fear will keep us from our path.

No matter how much the sacrifice seems worth it,

following the HEART is always a better plan.

Wait for the wave of peace that radiates when you are aligned.

Stay close to yourself.

Listen. Breathe. BE.

Energy Healer Heal Thyself: A Self-Care Technique

Posted on February 25, 2015 by jesalynjae

Since moving up north I have been hosting a Women’s Circle each month at the new moon. It’s been a great way for me to meet some new people and connect in a sacred way. I love facilitating the group and being nourished by the lovely women who show up each month. This month the focus was on self-care and self-love and I led the group through an energy healing technique to open the circle and ground. I was reminded of the importance of doing this on a regular basis for myself. I often find myself laying hands on my own body for various imbalances and ailments but I had not done a formal self healing in awhile. It helps balance out the body and energy system and can be done as often as you like. And since I fully believe that we each have the ability to heal ourselves, it was a good reminder for me.

It’s a great way to start or end your day or any time you feel like you need to relax or energize. The great thing about energy work is that you will get exactly what you need each time. There are versions of this in various traditions and they are all slightly different but I encourage you to let your intuition be your guide on this one. The Reiki self-healing technique starts at the head whereas the Healing Touch self connection starts at your feet. But, depending on how you feel from day to day, you could start at your belly.

Start by taking a few deep breaths and get comfortable seated on a chair or on the ground. Imagine that you are growing roots like a tree and feel yourself grounding. Set the intention that this healing will be for the highest good of all concerned and that you will receive everything that you need whether you know what that is or not. If you have the time and space you can light a candle or some incense and play soft music to set the mood but any time you can devote to this is fine.

Next start by placing your hands somewhere on your body. Again you can start at your feet and work your way up, the reverse of this, or any which way you like. If you are experiencing pain somewhere you could start there. As you place your hands bring your attention to this area of the body and imagine sending healing energy. This could be in the form of an affirmation, gratitude, imagining white light, or love. If you have learned any symbols associated with energy techniques or have something else that resonates with you, feel free to use that as well. Make sure you keep breathing throughout and imagine the fresh oxygen is flooding the area where your hands are.

Spend as much time as you think you need at this first spot and then move on when you feel ready. It feels nice to keep your hands connected as much as you can so during transitions either move one hand at a time or slide to the next position. You can decide what spots to include along the way and it might be different every time. It’s great to hit the 7 main chakra points but there are so many other options and all are beneficial. Take 5-10 minutes or 30-45; any amount is perfect. Also, if there is a spot that you can’t comfortably reach you can imagine you are touching that spot. The saying in energy work is “energy flows where attention goes” or “action follows intention” so simply just envisioning the spot you want to give some love to will do.

http://www.sage-thyme.com/what-are-chakras/

End with gratitude for yourself and all the helpers and teachers in your life (angels, ancestors, guides, animals, etc) and take a few more deep breaths. Bring back the tree root visual or anything else that helps you feel grounded and give yourself time to transition to your next activity. Make sure to have some water and check in with how you are feeling emotionally and physically. Sometimes you will feel refreshed and relaxed but other times this may bring up agitation or irritability. If negative feelings are strong or lasting and/or you are having trouble grounding try to get outside and put your bare feet into the earth. Repeat as often as you like!

Healthy Happy Holidays

Posted on November 30, 2014 by jesalynjae

There is no denying it now…the holidays are here! This time of year can be joyful and fun but can also come with stress, sickness and obligation. Here are my best tips for making the most of it and staying sane:

Emotional/Energetic Health

*Hell yes or no! – When you are asked to attend that party, bake 12 dozen cookies, shop the crowds, etc, etc take a moment to ask yourself if you really want to go. If your whole self doesn’t say “hell yes, that sounds awesome” then say no. It is easy to get overwhelmed with plans and then feel drained. Do only what nourishes you. I understand that some family obligations may not be a hell yes but you still have to or want to go. I get that, but minimize this as much as possible and if a family gathering is really not going to be in your best interest, give yourself permission to say no to that also.

*Get quiet & relax– nature dictates this as a time of year to go within ourselves and reflect. The days are shorter and the weather is getting colder. It’s natural to want to stay home and cuddle up but this has been made into the busiest time of the year for many. Make time to sit in meditation, take a gentle yoga class or just lounge around and watch Netflix.

*Loving-kindness – Being around family (or not having family) can stir up old hurts. Ram Dass wisely says “If you think you are enlightened, go spend a week with your family” We can easily get caught up in re-living the past, the unsavory political dinner conversations or feeling attacked for your life choices. The ancient practice of loving-kindness can shift this feeling in you in the moment or over time. There are different versions of this, some more adapted for Westerners but it goes something like this. You can do this formally in meditation or say this to yourself toward someone during an encounter with family. Another thing that I like to do if I am struggling to listen or relate, is to imagine energy flowing from my heart to theirs. In whatever practice you choose, remember to first love yourself!

*Fresh air/nature – We end up being inside more this time of year but don’t forget to get some fresh air and connect to nature. This helps us stay grounded and reduces stress. Getting your bare feet in the earth may not be an option but make contact with a tree trunk and feel the energy flow. Tree hugging is a thing and it’s good for us! 🙂

Physical Health

*More H2O – It’s easy to forget to drink water when it’s no longer warm outside but your body needs water in the winter too. Drink just as much water, if not more, than you would during the warmer months. I like to start the morning with warm lemon water with a dash of cayenne pepper. It helps me to start drinking water in the morning so I continue the trend throughout the day.

*Essential oils – I have several go-to oils for my health. Thieves, peppermint, oregano and lavender are my recommendations. Thieves is great for sickness prevention and keeping the immune system strong, peppermint and lavender are the best all around oils for a long list of things and oregano is natures antibiotic. I use the oils topically, diffused and internally. Make sure you have therapeutic grade in order to ingest them, not all oils are created equally. I use Young Living but there are other brands out there that are high quality as well, please do your research.

*Green smoothies/juices – I love veggies as much as the next girl and I cook with and eat them often. But for me, the best way to get tons of green goodness into my system is to make a juice or smoothie. Lately I have been giving my Vitamix a lot of love and have a formula that I more or less follow.

80/20 veggies to fruits and fruits that are low on the glycemic index like apples and berries (many folks make the mistake of making a very fruit forward creation that is high in sugar), vary your greens and veggies, water as base instead of fruit juice, chia seeds, spirulina, cacao for a treat, fresh ginger, cinnamon, cayenne. Winter is typically a time for soups and stews which I say yes to as well but I add the ginger, cinnamon and cayenne to bring that warming quality that we desire in the winter. I happen to love ginger and include it most of the time anyway but especially in winter.

*Vitamins/herbal supplements – Putting good food in your body is critical but I also take certain vitamins and herbs to ensure I stay well. A good quality multiple is helpful but I also take a B complex, vitamin D (more during the winter), vitamin C (extra if I feel under the weather) and Maca root when I need an energy boost. I also drink herbal tea regularly and either buy loose leaf or the Traditional Medicinals brand that is most often organic and is formulated by herbalists. This blend of things is what helps me most but every body is different. As my good friend and health coach says “if your supplements don’t make you feel better, it’s just expensive urine” Explore and find out what works best for you.

Spiritual Health

*Sing, dance and be merry – Let the spirit of the season envelop you. If you don’t love it all, choose what you do love and go with that. Song and dance have great power and when done correctly (correct = whatever you resonate with) can be a spiritual experience. Move your lips and your hips and do it with love.

*Celebrate ceremoniously – Holiday traditions are sometimes deeply rooted or newly minted. Find something fun about this time of year and make it sacred. If what you’ve been doing isn’t working or no longer fits your mold, change it! Ceremonies are important but only if they make you feel awesome. I love getting out my holiday decorations and looking at my recap of last year and hopes and dreams for this one – I keep them in the decoration boxes. I also have this great collection of sweet collectors bears that make me smile year after year.

May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you be free from suffering. May this holiday season be filled with joy and love.

Let Go or Be Dragged

Posted on September 30, 2014 by jesalynjae

I’m moving to San Jose.

Those are 5 words I never ever thought I would say. Moving has not been on my radar at all, but this Native San Diegan is taking off for the Bay Area. In the past when I thought about moving, it was always to another country because I couldn’t imagine finding anywhere in the U.S. that I would like better than San Diego. I still think San Diego is pretty rad. It’s where I was born and raised and where all my family lives. But, sometimes the path we think we are on is different from the one we are actually living.

I’ve also been unhappy at my day job for more than a year.

That’s a phrase I have uttered and one that I have felt deep into the core of my being. But I stayed anyway. Why? Fear about sums it up.

Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear that I couldn’t find anything better. Fear that doing what I love wouldn’t pay the bills.

And so when I told a good friend that I was finally going to be able to give my notice she mentioned the Zen saying “let go or be dragged”. My yoga teacher and friend said “this is what will get you out of that job finally!” and countless others commented on how excited I must be to leave.

This upcoming move has left me no choice but to leave a job I have long since felt passionate about, but in turn I will be leaving behind many things I do love. I trust in the process though and I know that this will be a good move and that really I have been asking for this. Feeling stressed, coming home crying on a semi-regular basis and even shedding tears at work wasn’t enough to do it. So here I am with less than 2 weeks left at my job and no plan for what I will do when I get up north. My fiance was offered an amazing job opportunity and will be able to support the family (me, him and the cat) while I get settled.

And still there is fear. I have always worked and live in this paradigm where I have to support myself and bring in income. But, here is an opportunity to get my bearings, figure out what direction I want to go and trust that all will work out perfectly. I have so many passions and a deep desire to share them and so I step into this new journey knowing that I have to give up the life I planned in order to have the life that is waiting for me.

Labor Day Lovespiration

Posted on August 28, 2014 by jesalynjae

The inspirations for this blog always come from life. My life to be more specific, and often the themes and issues that I see in the lives of the people I work with. As we approach Labor Day and a wedding I will attend over the weekend, I can’t help but think of this little love story. Sometimes the hardest thing we do in life is let more love in.

3 years ago on Labor Day my partner and I decided to go to Seaport Village to play tourist in our own beautiful city. We walked around and then grabbed a snack but couldn’t find anywhere to sit. A couple offered for us to join them and we learned that their names were Pat and Kathy. He was a pilot for FedEx and was overjoyed that his wife was able to join him on a business trip for the first time ever. They told us about their kids and the wonderful life they had shared so far and then asked us about our relationship and if we planned to get married. My boyfriend spoke up and said “Oh, she doesn’t want to get married”

Pat shared that, like me, he had come from divorced parents and told Kathy from the start that he didn’t plan on marrying her. He said “we were together 5 years before we got married but I can honestly say marrying Kathy is the best decision I have ever made” Cue the tears and the most tender “see it wouldn’t be so bad” look from my love. It was a special moment that I didn’t know would get even better. You could tell the couple was moved as well and Kathy said to Pat that it felt like a “vadeju.” She explained this to be a reverse dejavu and that once when they were our age they saw a cute older couple who had been together a long time. They both felt very inspired by this couple and hoped that one day they would be able to pay it forward. More tears. In fact, as many times as I have told this story I can’t do so without getting goosebumps and a little teary eyed.

We said our goodbyes, mentioned some things to do in San Diego and gave them our free zoo passes that we get for being members. As we walked away my boyfriend had the biggest grin on his face and I think he was sort of skipping (although that’s not terribly out of character) I told him he looked like he had won something. He promptly responded “Oh, I have!” You see, he knew as well as I did that they were placed in front of us for a reason. He barely even believed in that at the time but knew for certain that we were meant to meet them. Sometimes we wish we could find them and say thank you and maybe we will get to someday. But, more than anything we hope we get to inspire another couple down the road with our love and commitment.

My now fiance loves me more than I could ever explain but it has not always been easy for me to accept that love. It’s getting easier and easier and I definitely have Pat and Kathy to thank for that.

Waterfall kissing in Ecuador

Nip Sickness in the Bud Miso Soup

Posted on July 24, 2014 by jesalynjae

I have a handful of recipes that I make on a regular basis. Some of them are written down and others (like this one) I just throw together when I need. I always make this soup for breakfast if I wake up feeling a little off. It might be a sore throat or achy body but if my first thought is “oh no, I hope I’m not getting sick,” this is my go-to recipe. I always have what I need to make the bare bones of this soup and then I add extras according to what is in my fridge. I learned awhile back (when I kept pushing myself and got pneumonia in grad school) to take care of myself before I get really sick. This soup along with some extra relaxing and hydration usually does the trick.

Now, I know the verdict is out on whether soy is good or not. Many say no and my take is to eat only in moderation and to eat it at home where I can buy organic or only go to places where I know they source good soy products. Miso is a soy product but it is fermented which comes with added health benefits. It is good for digestion, is high in antioxidants, helps the body detox from environmental contaminants and is known to improve your immune system. It is also very high in sodium so not something that I eat everyday for sure.

Ingredients:

Measurements are approximate. I usually make only one serving and sort of wing it when it comes to how much. This is why I am a cooker and not a baker (precision is not my strong suit)

1 clove garlic chopped

1 inch ginger diced or grated

1 TBS organic Miso paste (I use white or yellow-red is a much bolder flavor)

1 tsp toasted sesame oil

1 tsp soy sauce

a couple squirts of Sriracha (if you like spicy)

veggies (mushrooms, zucchini, shredded carrot, spinach, kale, other greens, whatever you have!)

juice of 1/2 lemon

green onions

Preparation:

Heat sesame oil in saucepan over medium heat, add garlic and ginger and saute for a few minutes until soft. I usually add the soy sauce now since the grated ginger will sometimes stick to the pan and this de-glazes it a bit. Also add veggies (except greens) Cook for a few minutes. Add Sriracha if using.

Add 1 1/2-2 cups boiling water (I boil it in my tea kettle first because I usually want to get this in my body fast!) Let simmer for a few minutes.

Dissolve the miso in warm water and slowly add to the soup. You don’t want to add it directly to the boiling water, it can kill some of the health benefits. Also, make sure not to cook for too long after miso is added.

Add greens and simmer just until wilted. Turn off heat and add juice of lemon and chopped green onions.

Eat right away saying to yourself “this soup nourishes my body and gives me exactly what I need to stay healthy and happy” 🙂

Keep the basics in the fridge and add any veggies you have

Enjoy! YUM

This little guy always make me feel better too! Cuddles with him while eating the soup are a bonus.

Coming Full Circle on Love and Relationships

Posted on June 19, 2014 by jesalynjae

This Memorial Day weekend I went to Kansas City to celebrate the 2 year anniversary of becoming a Reiki master. It was great to come back to the place where so much healing happened and to reflect back on all that has changed. As I prepare to teach Reiki 2 this weekend I am reminded of the path I took and the beautiful life that I co-created. I can’t wait to watch the path of each of my students unfold as well.

The theme of the second level of Reiki is healing relationships; it is the level of love. When I took level 2 in 2012 I set the intention to release a few things that I knew I was still hanging onto. It wasn’t until just before I embarked on my Level 3/Reiki master journey that I truly understood what that meant though. I realized I was having a hard time releasing expectations from a past relationship and got some guidance that if I was not able to release this I would not be successful in my current relationship. After a lot of tears and soul searching I had some more clarity.

My college boyfriend and I had expected to get married, have children and have a happy life together. We made a lot of promises that were not kept and the break up was terribly painful. Of course anyone who has been through a breakup likely knows this story. The love is true, the promises feel real, and the end is awfully raw and scary. There was no part of me that wished we had stayed together because I knew it would not have worked but nonetheless there is still pain in any loss.

So, I did what any self-healing healer would do. I took the promise ring that we shared with one another and I buried it in the backyard of the place where we stayed in a releasing ceremony under the full moon. All the Reiki sisters gathered ’round and took turns digging into the hard earth until we had a hole large enough to drop in the ring that was inscribed “to my future wife.” And then we stomped on the freshly dug earth. There may have been some whoops and howling at the moon also. I can guarantee you there was wine.

Since that fateful night I have let more love into my life than I could ever imagine. And as I arrived into Kansas City for the second time I couldn’t help but have a huge smile on my face as I looked at the new ring on the finger of my left hand. I buried a ring and all the energy that went with it to make room for everything I have now, including a new future husband. As for that past boyfriend and all of the experiences we had: I don’t regret any of it and wish him well. I just hope he is happy and learned as much as I did from the time we spent together.

I had hoped to have another full circle moment to share for this post but alas the universe had a different plan in mind. So I remind myself that if it’s meant for me it won’t pass me by.

To love and healing and burying shit in people’s backyards!

Nyepi: Day of Silence in Bali

Posted on April 24, 2014 by jesalynjae

I recently got back from a trip to Bali, Indonesia to celebrate 5 years of being with my boyfriend. It just so happened that on March 31, which is the day of our anniversary, was a national holiday on the island of Bali. It is called Nyepi and is the Hindu new year. The people in Bali are overwhelmingly Hindu despite the fact that Indonesia as a whole is mostly Muslim. On this day from 6am to 6am the following day everyone stays inside to be with family, pray, meditate and unplug…literally. There is no electricity used after 6pm. The day changes every year so it was very special that it landed on our day of celebration.

The day before there is a parade where statues called Ogoh-ogoh are paraded around the town to music and celebration and then they are burned. These represent demons and evil spirits and are offered as a way to purify humans of any spiritual pollutants. The following day of silence is meant to be a day of reflection as well as follows the folklore that if the whole island is quiet the evil spirits will not find anyone. No one is exempt from the rules of Nyepi and everyone must stay inside including tourists. Some Balinese people fast or meditate on this day, others just stay inside and relax. As one of our taxi drivers told us, “I don’t eat for half the day but then I am hungry.”

Luckily, we were staying in a beautiful hotel so not being able to leave all day was not a problem. The hotel organized some activities including learning to make Balinese treats and making the flower offerings that you see all over the country. It was a nice chance to just relax. I read my book and we spent time by the pool. We ate our hotel dinner by candlelight and went to bed fairly early. That night the stars were AMAZING! I have been camping and summer trips to Lake Powell used to be my favorite time for star gazing, but these were like I had never seen before. So magical!

Bali is a seriously spiritual country and this was clear throughout our trip but especially for Nyepi. The whole country gets quiet in the name of a spiritual experience and to start their year on the right foot. I love that! Their connection to the Divine is clear in everything they do; there are temples and statues of Gods throughout the country. Each house even has a temple where they leave daily offerings of flowers, food and incense.

One of my favorite parts of traveling is seeing the way other people live, love and connect to each other, their beliefs and ways of healing. The Balinese are deeply spiritual, happy people. They live simply and are connected to nature and ritual. I will forever hold my visit to the island of Bali in my heart because of the people, the beauty, and not to mention the fact that the next day I got engaged. But, that’s another post for another day!